self-pleasure

self-pleasure 101

cultivating a regular self-pleasure practice is one of the most healing gifts you can offer yourself. it’s not just about ‘self-care’, or pleasure as mindless indulgence or escape. it’s about landing into and claiming the ecstatic path—the path of the body, of our most wild aliveness. self-pleasure is not exclusively sexual, or masturbation, though that can certainly be a powerful and delicious aspect of it.

a pleasure practice is in essence about creating an intentional container that supports you to more effectively commune with your creative life force energy—to get intimate with your original essence, as well as the conditioning, traumas, and blockages that keep us from more fully embodying that essence. pleasure practice invites leaning into and orienting to pleasure, but also challenges us to invite home the wounded, rejected, tense parts of us. to fill our cup with divine goodness and expand our pleasure capacity, and with it our capacity to heal and grow beyond the limitations of our past conditioning and trauma.

the felt-sense, or our experience of sensation within the body, is our most direct way of meeting our life-force essence. as we encounter and presence these sensations, we can work with pleasure as a way to alchemize and integrate them to create greater coherence and the experience of wholeness. the foundational pillars of transformation, and the primary self-pleasure tools are: breath, sound, movement, and touch.

explore for yourself:

set a timer for at least 15minutes

create a private, sensually supportive space for yourself to drop in.

play some music, light candles, get physically comfortable.

perhaps start with a few minutes dancing or shaking to wake up the body and invite grounding.

begin with some deep breaths, and turn your gaze inward. offer yourself some touch. maybe tender, loving embrace, sensual touch, sexual touch—what is your body asking for? what does it feel like to say ‘yes’ to receiving your own love, to generate your own pleasure through touch?

move slowly, tracking through the body. what sensations do i notice?

as you encounter the sensation (or lack of sensation), get curious!! would breath/sound/movement/touch be supportive to offer this sensation? what happens if i breathe into the tightness in my chest? what if i offer my heart some supportive touch? is there a sound that wants to emerge from there? the body has a language all it’s own. what is is saying?

this is a practice of listening and exploring. of experimenting and getting to know yourself. you literally cannot fuck it up! it is sacred, yes. and also it is playful and casual and any other flavor your desire to bring in.